Funny Quotes from The Office, The O.C. and More

So, what funny quotes have we heard this week? Well, we have an acknowledgement that the end is near on The O.C., Roy trying to impress Pam on The Office and a part of the male anatomy that figures into a couple of punch lines on How I Met Your Mother and Two and a Half Men. These funny quotes are from the week of February 11th, 2007 and made the TVaholic laugh. How about you?

Funny Quote of the Week

Show: The O.C. (FOX)
Episode: The Night Moves (Season 4)
The Setup: This is the second to last episode of The O.C. and Ryan was hurt in the earthquake. Later, when Ryan wakes up in the hospital, Seth tells him that he had to donate blood.
Seth: The doctors say you are going to be fine. Although, you’re going to have to wrap your head around the fact that we are really brothers now. We’re blood brothers.
Ryan: You, donated blood?
Seth: Ahh, I had an extra few pints flowing through my veins. It was no big deal.
Ryan: Mmm, you’re not a big fan of needles.
Seth: Nor of fainting, it turns out. But, the bank was a little low and us O-negative guys got to stick together.
Ryan: Mmm, that’s weird, because all of a sudden I have this strange urge to listen to Death Cab and read comic books.
Seth: Really?
Ryan: No. I’m kidding.
Seth: Ahh, it’s too bad, cause if we could’ve turned this into a body swap comedy. We could’ve squeezed another year or two out of this.

More Funny TV Quotes

Show: The Office (NBC)
Episode: Business School (Season 3)
The Setup: Pam is displaying some of her pieces from art school and has invited people from work to come. Roy shows up with his brother and then talks to Pam as they are leaving.
Roy: It’s cool if I go, right? I mean I looked at all of them.
Pam: Yah, I’ll drive myself home.
Roy: To my place?
Pam: Maybe, I’m a little tired.
Roy: Your art, was the prettiest art, of all the art.

Show: Two and a Half Men (CBS)
Episode: My Damn Stalker (Season 4)
The Setup: Alan has ventured out into the world of online dating. He has embellished his profile just a bit. He meets Beverly, played by guest star Allison Janey (The West Wing), and she tells him of her troubles in finding anyone dateable online. Her string of losers is quite impressive and she starts to think Alan is another one to add to her list.
Alan: Oh, no, no, I’m not gay.
Beverly: Whatever it is, I don’t have the time or the strength to deal with it.
Alan: Beverly wait. Wait. You know my loser brother? I’m him.
Beverly: What?!
Alan: This is Charlie’s house. Ah, after my divorce, I was broke and, and he took me in. And I’m not the chiropractor to the stars. Ah, I mostly handle slip and fall insurance claims.
Beverly: That’s all?
Alan: What do you mean, that’s all?
Beverly: I mean, married, married, gay, parole violation, Alan you’re a catch.
Alan: I am?
Beverly: Come on, you’re single, you’re straight and you’re a genetic male.
Alan: So, I guess the bars not that high.
Beverly: Have you done much online dating? You cleared it with a penis and a job.
Alan: And just to put your mind at ease, I plan on keeping both of them.

Show: How I Met Your Mother (CBS)
Episode: Lucky Penny (Season 2)
The Setup: Ted and Robin came across a wedding dress sale where a bunch of women had already started camping out to be the first in line. Lily wants to go get in line, as well.
Lily: We have to camp out.
Ted: Are you serious?
Lily: You don’t understand. This is an amazing sale. I’ve heard about it before but I never knew where it was. (Gasps in) We’ll all have a wedding dress camp out. It’ll be fun.
Barney: I can’t go. I have this thing.
Lily: What thing?
Barney: A penis.

What funny quotes got you laughing this past week on TV? Situation that made you chuckle? Let us know in the comments.

Meet the Author

Jason the TVaholic
0 comments… add one

Leave a Comment